One summer I found myself unemployed and I was aproached by my senior Officer in the FCA (Irish Reserve Army) and asked "Do you want to be in a movie".

Before we aggreed to join the cast we were always roared at if we were not close shaven. When we signed the contract with the film company It stated that we needed to grow a beard. SOOooo we still got roared at but didnt shave.

1500 of us arrived by bus up to the largest militery camp in Ireland, Signs saying that no cameras were allowed and loads of check points were the norm. If you wanted to cross the road you needed to show your ID to the guards at both sides. The place I think was also the largest Camp in Europe and it was made up of several barracks and a village within, everyone living there was related to sombody in the militery.

The first day was hectic 1500 people that were stramgers to each other from all around Ireland wanting to be fed and Bed. We all had to Q for everything toilets/water/food/spears/shields e.t.c.

All we were told was that the film was about Scotland. Mel Gibson was coming over to direct and star in it and It was going to be a hit.

We started off and we were fitted for costumes and wigs. if you ever look at the film close you will see that we were all wearing cheap black velcrose running shoes. We got Welsh Scothish English and Irish Costumes. They felt a bit strange at first until we got used to the draught.

We were brought to the top of "THE HILL" and marched up and down all day long in rows just to see what it looked like on Cameras. after a day or two this got boring, and everybody wanted to know where the fuck Mel Gibson was. Mel eventually showed up, We all were amazed as he came over talking to us making jokes and went for a piss in the forest and came out with sheep wool caught on his jeans. A load of people came over to shake his hand and he soon fucked off again. We were warned not to ask him for autographs and also not to flirt with the makeup ladies or film crew. After several people were fired from the set and sent home the message was fairly clear. Instead the lads flirted with all the officers and soldiers Daughters. After a week or two we found out 13 people got the clap off of one girl, so there was no more of that.

When filming began we were up at 4 in the morning, we waited in a line for about an hour to get our wigs on, It was painful as the hairdressers stuck pins and hair clips through the wig, your hair, your scalp, your skull. we then had to rub really cold wet dirt into our arms,arces,face and legs. Then it was run up and down hills all day long with a big inh thick wooden shield and a massive heavy metal claymore. We got off at 19:00 qued for a shower by that time it was 21:00 then got food, went for a drink, and it was lights out at midnight.

Let me tell you about the food. The first few days myself and my fried wandered into the canteen and had wonderful food with strawberries and cream for dessert e.t.c. a few days later we were kicked out and we found out it was the officers mess. Then we began to eat like the rest of the 1498 scumballs. The food looked like Pal with chunks (dog food) and was served on paper plates with plastic forks. We looked like animals guzzling down the food as we were starving.

Sooooo up every morning at 4am get marched to the top of a hill and run back down again....stop for some dog food... rub moss peat and dirt into our skin....shower and do the same thing for the whole summer... yeah I want to be in another movie..not. After all that I see myself on film for 1.5 seconds.

Injuries: This was fun. Some of the hard bastards decided to play rough, so some guy took a beating off another. The guy that took the beating was a member of the real wallace clan and so the next take of the battle scene the guy that beat him came face to face with around 30 wallace clan members ready to kick the living shit out of him... and they did. The camera crew were delighted at the wonderful acting we were doing.

My injury was not battle inflicted. I was lying down asleep and stuck my soward into the ground. When I opened my eyes all I saw was this metal soward come straight at me and hit me square in the eye. I spend the night in hospital and was blinded for a night. Fun Fun Fun.

We also had fun trying to smuggle out bits of costume from the set. we would have tunics on under our dress uniform and rob arrow tips e.t.c. the Militery police raided our living quarters on more than one occasion. Also Cameras if we had them on the set the film was ripped out and the camera was confiscated. we still smuggled them through though, hiding them up our kilts so we appered to have a set of square balls.

We eventually ended up playing dead in scenes as often as we could instead of trying to get in front of the camera lens. We got sick of the site of Actors, And when some of us got offered to stay on for a few more weeks work a lot of us turned the offer down.

One thing that I noticed about learning the way a movie is made: It ruins all the movies you will ever watch (a bit).

They make the last scenes from the movie first, really anoyed me.

Every time I see a movie now its a case of Oh look thats where they cut that scene, I know whats going to happen next a fake scare b4 the real one. When the action is going to take place, endings all that stuff you become more aware of, as nearly all movies have the same structure IMHO :-) you also pay attention of all the details of the movie, notice mistakes and things that should not be there. Eg: Modern Red bricks on walls for a 13th Century period, Tackies and plastic showing, people smoking fags, wearing wrist watches and rings,

Theres a few clasic mistakes on aliens 4 where one guy has guns up his sleaves that shoot down into his hands, while his hands are behind his back. The next shot shows no guns and the next he whips them out and shoots guys.

Also they are all wearing new rock boots.

well thats all my thoughts on films at the moment, I will get some BH pics up as soon as I get a modem for my new PC.

Hope nobody is offended by anything I have wrote.