did you ever notice how
sometimes
when you're not paying attention
reality slips
just a little bit
just enough
so you know it happened
colors dancing on a white ceiling
or a spider smiling
and saying hello
and you think
that couldn't have happened
and go on your merry way
but then
it happens again
a little more
more than the last time
the spider has friends
or music in your head
and you think
am i crazy
until
when you least expect it
it jumps out
full force
just for a second
a colony of spiders
colors everywhere
and you think
what is that
till one day
when it comes
and you want it to
multicolored spiders everywhere
singing forgotten ballads
and you don't think
you just open your mouth
and let the music fill you
when you realize
reality is those spiders
and you are one of them
singing along
this life is the web
the spiders weave
around the poor unfortunate souls
they trap
and you broke free
free to be
any color
any size
anything

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i wish i had a purple kitty cat

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happiness is knowing what you want is within reach
not everything you want, that would be too simple
just enough that you don't have to pine anymore
enough that you can sleep at night without the nightmares
the dreams that keep you afraid to go to bed
the fear that nothing good will ever come
happiness is a kiss on a warm spring day
or a cold winter morning before the fire
or stove
being with the one you love
without fear
without the pain of knowing nothing is ever true
knowing that you will someday be parted
happiness is not having to worry about the stupid things
like war or famine or whether those shoes match that dress
or how old you'll be when you die
happiness is the absence of sadness
it sounds silly but it's true
so share your happiness
wherever you find it
be it meaningless chain poems
or purple kitty cats from total strangers
give a little love back to the world
there's so little of it out there
happiness is sharing your gift with the world
and feeling other gifts return

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i wake up sometimes and feel as though there is no answer no truth no understanding but still i sit here and wonder why i feel this way is it wrong to be
 upset by the way my life is going is it crazy to sit and wonder about the future do i need to always be a part of the crowd can't i just once be myself 
me the me i want to be or do i always have a persona a mask to show the world where has my self gone why can't i be myself i want to be happy in who and 
what i am but i don't want to be hurt again happiness is hard work it doesn't just fall out of the sky into your lap for you to enjoy you have to work at 
it every day and one day you wake up and feel free and fell real and right and good and wonderful but it isn't always like that there will always be bad 
things in the world the question is how you will react to the bad along with the good will you scream an dcry it isn't fair or will you try to get through 
them with grace and a smile and if you smile is the smile real and if the smile is real do you truly want to be happy when bad things are happening around 
you?

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smile, someone loves you